Sand And Lava
by samusaran101
Summary: Daisy is the tomboyish princess of Sarasaland. Compared to Peach, she's pretty much nothing. She has been taught about how Bowser, the King of the Koopas, is her evil enemy. But what if he is the only person who truly knows and understands her? DaisyxBowser story.
1. A Daily Kidnapping Goes Wrong

Sand and Lava

Hi! I'm samusaran101 and this is my very first Mario story! I've always thought of Bowser and Daisy as a cute couple. If you really think about it, it beats Peach x Bowser anytime. I hope to make believers of this couple! By the way, if you're looking for other good fanfics on Bowser x Daisy, read _The Tomboy and_ _the Beast_ by AliceStar. She rocks! Enjoy!

"Yes!" I waved my aqua-blue tennis racket in the air. "Daisy, twenty-five, Luigi, _zip! _What have you got to say for yourself, Plumber Boy?"

Luigi, who had sweat trickling down his pale face, panted desperately. "You're good,"

"Good?" I arched an eyebrow.

"Fine, really good,"

"Really good?"

"Okay, okay! You're the best tennis player I know! Stop torturing me! Stars!"

I chuckled, walking to a comfy bed-like chair and plopping down on it. Princess Peach Toadstool, my oh-I'm-so-perfect cousin, watched me in slight disdain as I carelessly stretched on it, burying my head into the hard hot-pink (unfortunately) rubber. "You could at least cross your legs," she commented. I stuck my tongue out at her. Peach sighed in mere reply. Mario smirked, not removing his eyes from his _Mushroom Fancy_ magazine.

Okay. If you're a girly girl, you're probably wondering, _why is this…this __**thing**__ spending time with_ _Princess Peach?_ But if you're a tomboy-like me-stick around and let me introduce myself.

My name is Princess Daisy of Sarasaland, but I also go by Daiz (Peach), Boy Girl (I was kind of miffed when Mario first tried that that one, but hey, it works!) and D-Girl. (Weegee). Imagine this: a perfect king and his perfect wife rule a kingdom fairly, kindly, and properly. They go by tradition, never breaking the rules or being a rebellion. Princes must marry a princess, train with all weapons, and have polite-ugh, I don't even like to say it-_manners_. _(Blah!) _Princesses must marry a prince, wear only the finest dresses, and act regally. Both prepare for the land they will one day take over and rule.

And then _I _come along.

Everyone smirks at the thought of the tomboyish, clumsy daughter of the King ruling Sarasaland one day. I was everything a real princess wasn't: rough, brawn, fiery, and_ awesome_ at karate (Well, I'm the only one who thinks that after I whipped Princess Jade's ass at my seventh and last birthday party). Oh, wait a minute, sorry. Princesses aren't allowed to use "foul language". Even the word "stupid" is a curse in royalty's beady little eyes. Isn't _that_ stupid?

Anyway, yeah. The point is I wasn't some helpless princess who can't defend herself from a giant turtle. _Cough_, Peach. Cough cough. Hack. Sneeze. Vomit. Cough. Whateves.

_Ahem_. So those may not be my talents. But I do have some. Tennis, card games, video games, arm wrestling, and soccer were some of them. There's also baseball, basketball, bowling, golf, running, swimming, diving, skiing, snowboarding… I could go on forever. But being a proper princess was nearly _numero uno_ on my "most hated things" list. But there _is_ one thing worse than that. Here, I'll show you:

Daisy's List of Most Hated Things/People

10: Getting waxed or getting a permanent tattoo.

9: Dresses.

8: Girly stuff.

7: Sexists.

6: Surprises.

5: Annoying Music.

4: Anyone who terrorizes my friends and/or family.

3: Pink.

2: Being a proper princess.

1: WALUIGI

Ah, yes. That always makes me feel better. So, what was I talking about? Oh, yeah, Waluigi. Let me just clear my throat…okay. Mmm.

**WALUIGI IS A SEXIST, UGLY, CRUEL, HATEFUL, UNCARING, SHOW-OFF, WEIRD, STUPID, DAMN ANNOYING IMITATION OF LUIGI, LOVING, SWEET, SHY, TIMID LUIGI,** _**MY BEST FRIEND**_**, WHO HAS LOVED ME FROM HIGHSCHOOL TILL NOW! I'M TWENTY-ONE FREAKIN' YEARS OLD AND THAT JERK STILL HASN'T GIVEN UP YET! He posted "Daisy is sexy" and "my hot girlfriend Daisy" all over the internet! PEOPLE ALL OVER THE WORLD READ IT AND TEASE ME ABOUT IT! He won't stop until I plant a kiss on his grubby little lips, but he's never going to accept the fact IT'S NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN! The closest I ever got to kissing him is punching him in the face!**

"I HATE YOU, WALUIGI!" I yelled to no one in particular.

Everyone-and I mean EVERYONE-in the Mushroom Kingdom Public Pool Center stared at me. I gulped and nervously crossed my legs like Peach had told me to. "Um, sorry 'bout that, peeps,"

"Lady Sarasaland?" A woman with a dark, tight black bun-_Mrs. Heathley_- raised an eyebrow. "Next time could you pose your sentence in a more… ladylike way, Princess? Without calling the citizens around you… _peeps_?"

Crap. I should've known Mrs. Deathly would show up and make me look like an idiot.

Mrs. Heathley-aka Mrs. _Deathly_-was my teacher in college. I flunked all her classes; reading, science, history, grammar, Spanish, and_**especially**_ math. And, to make things even worse, she taught us _manners_. If you ever moan or complain about subjects being boring, keep in mind you don't have to go through the horrors of "Put your napkin on your lap," and "Eat in a polite and princess-like manner,". I used to think Mrs. Heathley didn't like me. I was wrong. She _hated_ me.

Mrs. Heathley was out there to make my life a living hell. From giving me-and _only_ me-pop quizzes to "lady-like" personal lectures, everything was perfectly clear: she couldn't stand me at all. I may have failed math. But I can process these problems:

Daisy + manners = disaster

Daisy + pop quizzes = migraines

Daisy + personal lectures = thinking about jumping out the window

Daisy + manners + pop quizzes + personal lectures = you _really_ don't want to know.

Get the picture?

"Don't worry, Mrs. H.," I told her cheerfully. "I'll get better, you'll see!"

"Thank you," she responded coolly. Turning around, she marched away, muttering, "Freak,"

"Hey, I heard that!" I yelled after her. "If I see you on the street, you better run!"

Peach tried to calm me down. "Daisy, take a deep breath and think about your favorite things. It always works for me when I'm distraught."

Okay. My favorite things. This should be easy. Hitting Waluigi. Kicking Waluigi. Punching Waluigi. Beating up Waluigi…good times, good times. Wow. It actually worked! Advice from Peach-_Princess Peach!_-had worked! It's a miracle! No advice from her had ever worked before.

_Five-year-old Peach: Just be honest with him, Daisy! He'll like you!_

_Five-year-old Daisy: Sure! (NEXT DAY) Hi, Mike! You're so freakin' damn hot._

_ Mike: Freak._

_ Seven-year-old Peach: Just tell him, Daisy! Tell him how you feel! He'll like you!_

_ Seven-year-old Daisy: Okay. (NEXT DAY) Mike, I've loved you from preschool till now._

_ Mike: Mega freak._

_ Thirteen-year-old Peach: Just be yourself, Daisy! He'll like you!_

_ Thirteen-year-old Daisy: __**HELL NO! Do you know where your crappy advice has gotten me so far? Huh? NOWHERE! That's where!**_

_ Thirteen-year-old Peach: This is different! Being yourself is the most important thing in life!_

_ Thirteen-year-old Daisy: Fine. (NEXT DAY) Hey, you! Mike! Football today? __**ANSWER ME NOW!**__ Pretty please?_

_ Mike: No. Super Mega Freak…_

_ Thirteen-year-old Daisy: (chases Peach around with a hammer)_

See what I mean? I loved Peach a lot. But she gave terrible advice. And sometimes I could get a little jealous.

…okay, fine. A _lot_ jealous.

"_Why can't you be more like your cousin?_" That question was pretty much my childhood. Everyone preferred the beautiful princess of the Mushroom Kingdom to the scrawny boyish klutz that unfortunately was me. Peach had silky blonde hair; mine was reddish and frizzy. Peach had stunning pale skin with no facial problems; I had a bronze tan, freckles, and a zit on my nose. Peach wore a "ravishingly beautiful" pink dress; I wore an "eh" orange one. She was better than me in every way possible. And I'm not talking just looks. I'm talking _personality_, people! Peach was an oh-so-nice person, giving kids hugs and kisses while _I'm_ yelling at the boy who dropped him ice-cream on my driveway.

Suddenly, a clown-shaped car zooms over us.

Okay. I know what you're thinking: _Daisy is insane_. But I know I'm not because people around me are gasping in surprise, fear, and horror. Surprise I can understand. But why fear and horror? Are they anti-clown or something? I mean, yeah, clowns are as creepy as hell, but it was just an obstacle. I frowned at my scared-looking cousin and take a better look at the flying vehicle. Yup, it was just a clown car. It wasn't like it was…

...

Oh.

Oh my stars.

_Oh my freaking stars! It's him!_

Wait a minute. Why was I scared of him? He was only the big scaly moron who had the nerve to kidnap my cousin! I shouldn't fear him! In fact, I'm not afraid of him at all! I'll even prove it! I'm going to walk right up to that jerk and give him a piece of my mind!

Oh, and by the way, his name is Bowser, the King of the Koopas. I'm just putting that out there if you didn't know.

Once the clown car stopped, I kicked the door open with my foot. I could literally feel-yes, feel-people staring at me. They were probably thinking, "The princess of Sarasaland… going up against Bowser? Pfft," But I was very well trained in martial arts; I could definitely kick this Koopa's ass to the curb! I marched past the shock-stricken guards. Finally I came to Bowser. It was definitely him because no one had a bigger shell than him. He was turned away from me. I rudely prodded him in the back. "Hey! Yeah, I'm talking to you, King Koopa/Bowser…whatever your name is! I going to-" I stopped as soon as he turned around, an amused smirk on his face.

I immediately felt stupid when he stared at me with his red eyes, dark brows raised. "Yes, little girl? You're Princess Sarasaland, right?"

My face grew warm at the humorous sarcasm in his voice. "My name is Daisy," I informed him scornfully.

"Okay. You may continue… Dizzy." I blushed while he smirked devilishly.

I remembered why I had come here in the first place. "Oh, yeah," Ignoring his amused chuckle, I glared at him. "You always kidnap my cousin, Princess Peach Toadstool. How come?"

"Eh. I get bored."

"_You get bored?_ Is that really a reasonable excuse for capturing someone?"

"Um…yes?"

"NO!"

"…oh,"

"Forget it," I huffed and began walking away, until Bowser started…following me?

Was he mad? Insane? Mentally disordered, maybe?

"And just where do you think you're going? We should get to know each other a little more."

I frowned at him. "Okay. My name is Daisy, not Dizzy. I'm a clumsy, fiery, violent, hot-headed rebellious tomboy. The end."

Bowser smiled teasingly. "Wow. You're Peach's cousin? You guys look somewhat alike. But you're _**way**_ hotter." My cheeks reddened slightly as I huffed and rolled my eyes. "Yeah, right,"

The King of the Koopas grinned evilly. "Have you ever been kidnapped, Daisy?"

"Not once," I told him smugly."People say I've been kidnapped by this guy Tatanga, but it's just a bluff they created to make me look more like a 'proper princess'." I rolled my eyes again.

"So this is a first for you, huh?" I frowned at him, not understanding. Then I glanced out the window and guess what? We were off the ground! Not only off the ground; we were high in the air! I spun around, only to see Bowser laughing his ass off.

So, this poor, unsuspecting Koopa wanted to kidnap me, huh? Well, he's in for something else, baby! The boyish gal of Sarasaland was not going to let Bowser get the easy way out! But I'm not automatically violent; I'm also clever. So I didn't say anything at all. I just turned promptly on my heel and walked away, thinking of all possible ways to make Bowser's life hell. Just like Mrs. Heathley did to me.

Only _**much**_ worse.

Bowser couldn't believe it.

He had successfully kidnapped the famous tomboy of Sarasaland. So what was he going to do? Wait for Mario to come save her? Put her up for ransom?

_**NO DAMN WAY!**_

There was no way in hell he would do anything like that! In fact, he didn't know what to do. After all, he'd loved her for a while.

For years, he'd pretended to be interested in Peach while he had always loved the red-haired princess in secret. Bowser had lied to everyone, even himself. Sure, Peach wasn't half bad for a human female. But Daisy… holy crap, Daisy, with her fizzy hair and cute eyes and oh-so-luscious tan skin. And that body! All those Peach lovers out there would forget who the blonde princess was if they ever saw Daisy. Bowser decided to wait and see what tomorrow would bring.

Samusaran101: Thank you, everyone! Please read and review! And if you have any ideas, share them! See you next chapter!


	2. Bowser's Castle

Sand and Lava

Samusaran101: Hi people! Sorry I haven't updated in a few weeks. I was kind of busy with homework and SSBB and _SKYLANDERS GIANTS_! But here it is: the second chapter! I'd like to thank Yoshi with a Mustache, zaneyzane, and AliceStar, and a guest for reviewing. You guys rock!

Trust me, getting kidnapped is _not_ fun.

For one thing, it's as boring as a play directed by Goomba Shakespeare. There is _nothing_ to do on this damn thing! I was thinking of how to torture Bowser, but while a flying clown car is jerking sharply in every possible direction, it's not exactly easy. For another, that creep kept grinning at me! He probably thought of me as some kind of joke! I growled, wishing the old hags at my college (ECP: Experienced College for Princesses) would've let me wear my own choice of clothes instead of this loathing crap! In my normal black T-shirt and cargo pants, I could kick his scaly rear! But I was wearing an orange and yellow, long, overly-girly dress with jewels. _And_ lace. _And_ gems. _**And**_ a flower pedant! It was a tomboy's nightmare! Correction, it was _**my**_ nightmare!

But despite my feminine-like clothes, I was powerful! I was awesome! I was tough! And I was going to_ kill___this guy! I ran towards Bowser, my quick-paced foot at the ready. Damn, this felt great! I chanted to myself: What is Daisy? She is spunky! She is amazing! She is-

_**BANG!**_

Well, apparently she was clumsy as hell, because she just tripped over a bump in the ground. I hopped around, clasping my foot and cursing in Sarasalandian. Bowser roared with laughter. I was clearly giving him a free show here!

My eye twitched in anger as I straightened myself out: this Koopa was really asking for it! He was laughing at me! ME! _No one_, I repeat, _**NO ONE**_, laughs at me-Princess Daisy of Sarasaland-without getting beat up or at least a full-packed punch in the gut! Just ask Waluigi! Bowser is in for the worst beating he ever experienced!

I sprinted at him, fists balled tightly. I swung back my arm and hit him in the stomach. Oh yeah! That'll teach him never to laugh at _this _girl anymore! Wait a second; he doesn't seem to be in pain. In fact, is he even _laughing _again?

He is!

I stomped my foot like a two-year-old with anger management issues. "IT'S NOT FUNNY, YOU KIDNAPING MORON!"

He stopped laughing to wipe a tear out of his eyes. "I've got to hand it to you, kid, I actually felt that one."

"I AM NOT A KID, YOU IDIOT! I AM TWENTY-ONE YEARS OLD!"

Bowser raised an eyebrow, still grinning. "You know, for a princess, or even a lady, you've got a pretty intense temper there. You're a lot different than that girl Peach. She listened to whatever I said."

I huffed, frustrated. "Oh, yeah? Well, I'm very different than Miss Bubblegum Princess Peach Toadstool, in case you haven't noticed!"

"I've noticed, trust me. You're _way_ more awesome than her,"

I flustered slightly. "Why don't you just kidnap Peach as usual? Why me? I'm an impatient, nosy, loud, outgoing, boring, boyish klutz, and Peach is beautiful, fair, kind, and honest! What's with the change in the schedule, Bowser?"

Bowser shrugged. "I'm okay with all that boyish, clumsy, hot-headed stuff. Besides, all those things you just said about Peach are the reasons I wanted you here in her place."

I cocked my head, frowning. "Huh?"

"I'll explain once we get there. Oh, and by the way, you are _not_ boring. Hell, you're the complete opposite of boring! I've known you for a short time and I already_ know_ you're interesting as hell." The Koopa king smirked.

I blushed in spite of myself and shot a comeback at him. "You don't know if a person's interesting or not by spending five minutes with them. You've got to know them longer than that, Mr. Oh-I'm-so-Awesome-and-Brilliant. Where are we going, anyway?"

"Where are we going?" Bowser looked shocked. "Where do I take Peach every time she gets kidnapped?"

"I don't know. That's why I'm asking you, half-brain!"

"… I guess you've really never been captured before."

"No crap." I muttered.

"Well," Bowser spread his muscular arms out grandly, "we are going to my secret headquarters, my homeland, and the best place of all time; my castle!"

"Okkkkaaayyy… how is that your secret headquarters? Everyone knows where it is."

Bowser sulked teasingly. "You really love ruining people's epic moments, don't you?"

"Yes, I do, Bowser. Yes, I do." Believe it or not, I was starting to like this guy. He was funny, clever, mysterious, and yes, I'll admit his abs aren't half bad. But he was very easy to communicate with. Unlike… hmm, let me think. Oh yeah! _**Peach.**_

"Here we are!" Bowser gestured to a tall castle surrounded with lava. My jaw dropped when I spotted it; this was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. The crudely fashioned front board of Bowser was amazing. The gate, slimy with moss and gruel, was a perfect entrance. And the fire burning around every corner of the castle, daring others to seek their unfortunate demise, was ravishingly charming.

…yeah, I know it might not be your idea of beautiful, but to me this place was fine as hell. Then again, wrestling was my idea of beautiful, too, so others' points still stand.

Suddenly, I felt a strong claw wrap around my waist and land me to safety on the ground. To my relief, we weren't in the sky anymore; Bowser and I were on the earth. Ah, the good old earth. Ground likes me more than air. If I spent ten more seconds up there, I was definitely going to throw up. The dumb ECP teachers usually referred to it as 'hurling'. But what the hell, it's all the same thing. Vomit, heave, barf—oh, and my favorite: upchuck. It sounds like exactly what it is.

I remembered the dilemma here and glared at Bowser, pointing at him accusingly, "What was that for? I have feet, you know! I can walk myself!"

"Okay, okay… let me show you around."

I followed Bowser into his castle. To my surprise, I was very well behaved. Seriously; I didn't run, jump, holler, scream, curse, punch, hit, kick, beat up, yell, whine, or even complain like the normal Daisy would've. It was like I was acting like… a girl. Was Peach rubbing off on me?

_**GROSS!**_

The inside of the castle was a whole damn more regal than the outside. On the walls—which were painted dark crimson were pictures of Bowser and his family: Morton, Ludwig, Lemmy, Larry, Iggy, Wendy, and Bowser Jr. Even though it was probably none of my business, I couldn't help but wonder why Roy, one of Bowser's older children, was missing from all the photos. The floors were golden and black lined with a white stripe going through the middle, separating the colors. There was a bunch of Thwomps in one corner and giant doors lined in silver at every visible setting. There was even a huge statue of Bowser posing like a ballerina, at which I laughed.

"So, could you explain the whole I-want-Daisy-in-my-castle-instead-of-Peach-because -I-want-to-drive-someone-else-insane thing?" I asked innocently.

He grinned. "Sure thing, Princess. Whenever—"

_**POOF!**_

A cloud of purple smoke erupted in my face and I wheezed brutally; smoke and I do not mix, trust me. Once all the dust was gone, I saw two Koopas in its place. Both wore long blue robes, a pointed blue hat, and a tiny pair of spectacles. The only difference was that one had long white hair and the other held a scepter, which determined their opposite genders. Both completely ignored me and hurried over to a shocked-faced Bowser. They were probably his servants.

"How was your day, your Nastiness?" asked the female.

"May I interest you in a cup of tea, your Mightiness?" the male offered.

The girl glared at him. "A foot rub would be much, _much_ better than a nasty cup of expired tea, your Powerfulness. Tea is high in caffeine and cholesterol. A simple two-hour foot rub would be much more accurate. It allows you to relax without generally disturbing your health issues. Ignore Kamek and follow me to your personal massage room on the third floor."

The Koopa who must've been Kamek smirked. "Actually, your Awesomeness, tea is rather good for you, or at least my tea which I ground out of the freshest tasting of sugars, spices, and herbs. Foot rubs go by quickly. A hearty cup of tea, however, does not. And, by the way, it has no cholesterol whatsoever. Kammy was _obviously_ lying about that. Think about it, your Majesty."

"A foot rub is much better, your Highness."

"My tea is simply wonderful, your Gracefulness."

"Foot rub!"

"Tea!"

"_Foot rub!"_

"_Tea!"_

"**Foot rub!"**

"**Tea!"**

"_**FOOT RUB!"**_

"_**TEA!"**_

"**SILENCE!" **bellowed Bowser. "What I need is for you two hags to shut up and get the hell out of here!"

Kamek and Kammy grumbled, punching each other on the way out.

I looked at Bowser. "Who were—"

"Servants."

"Yeah, I thought so."

"Anyway, let's continue and head to the point: whenever I kidnap Peach, you know how she acts? Nice! _Too_ nice! **WAY** too nice! I criticize her at _everything_ and she's still freaking nice! What do you have to do to get on her bad side?"

I rolled my eyes. "That's Peachy for you; always sweet and loving."

Bowser snorted. "I know, right? The point is I want an aggressive lady, a girl who speaks her mind and kicks serious butt, just like you. So… here you are, in my castle! So enjoy your stay… and all that crap."

I progressed this. "Can you at least give me a nice cell? You know, one with a toilet, at least-"

"A cell?" Bowser frowned. "You thought I was taking you to a… _**cell**_?" He burst out laughing.

I began to feel nervous. "Well, yeah. Um, forget the nice cell part, just, uh, take me somewhere where I can live, please?"

"I'm not taking you to a cell, Daisy."

I started freaking out. _"Where do I go then?"_

The Koopa King smirked. "You go to a room."

"A… room…" A slow, relieved smile spread across my face as I wrapped Bowser into a huge hug. "Thank you so much! I was so scared!"

Bowser staggered backward, and I realized I was hugging—_hugging!_—the Koopa King! I released him immediately, blushing pink. "I'm sorry… I didn't—"

"Sorry!" Bowser laughed. "Are you kidding? I've been _dreaming_ of this moment! Seriously: hugging Princess Daisy was always my dying wish. Do I get a kiss next time?"

I blushed even redder as I shoved him away. "Oh, forget it. Where's my room?"

"It's right in that door right there. I'll get you a guide just in case." He grinned. "What did you think I would do with you? Burn you on a stake?"

I blinked. "You're kidding, right?"

Bowser winked and yelled, **"KAMMY!"**

The female Koopa I recalled earlier reappeared. "Yes, your Greatness?"

"Take this woman to her grave at once!" When I paled, Bowser gave a huge smile. "I mean her _room_."

"Yes, your Smartness." Kammy turned primly on her heel to face me. "Follow me, Princess Pea—" She stopped midsentence. "You're not Peach."

I sighed. "I'll explain on the way."

"So, his Majesty kidnapped you this time?" Kammy asked as we strolled down a hall.

"Yup."

"… well, this is new."

"Yeah, I guess. Bowser's been kidnapping Peach for a long time."

"Indeed."

"…"

"…"

(Cricket chirp)

"So what's your favorite color?" I asked, desperate to make conversation.

"I like blue."

"Cool. Mine's green."

"Your favorite color is green? You always wear orange and yellow, though."

"Yeah, I know. My designers are, like, the opposite of me."

"You have people pick out your clothes?" Kammy cocked her head.

"Hey, that was _not_ my idea." I protested. "But yes. It's a princess thing."

"Those poor people." stated Kammy.

"I think you mean poor _me_!" I objected. "I have to wear everything they tell me to! Even if they choose… _pink_." I barely whispered the last word.

Kammy smiled lightly and swung open a door swiftly. "Here is your room, Miss Daisy."

I smiled. "Thank y—" I caught sight of my room, the smile long gone.

Three words: It. Was. Pink.

No. It was not a pink room. It was pink heaven! There were pink walls and pink floors and pink ceilings and pink beds and pink windows with salmon hearts hanging from the floor. There were pink chairs and pink wardrobes and pink dressers and a pink flat screen TV. And all of this was brought out from the sparkly girly_** PINK**_ lamps in _**EVERY FRICKING CORNER!**_

"No problem." Kammy smiled. "Oh, and let me introduce you to your new roommate. Wendy, your Sweetness, you may come out now!"

I turned around to see a beautiful female Koopa teenager in a frilly pink skirt. She wore tons of cherry lipstick and had a massive pink bow in her hair. I recognized her immediately; she was none other than Bowser's thirteen-year-old daughter, Princess Wendy Olivia Koopa. Wait a second. I had to share a room with this girly girl?

Crap.

She extended a manicured claw. "Princess Daisy of Sarasaland, I presume?"

"Hi," I said dully.

She frowned. "You are truly an improper princess. You state a princess's full name while addressing her."

"Oh,"

The princess sighed. "Leave my presence, Kammy. I've got work to do."

"Yes, your Fairest." Kammy awkwardly opened the creaky door and left.

Wendy turned to me. "Okay. I'm ignoring your lack of manners, freshness, and totally 80s hairdo. But these clothes have got to go."

I looked down at my dress. "What's wrong with it? I mean, hell, take it by all means, but why?"

"Why?" Wendy frowned. "It is, like, the most un-posh disgrace I've ever seen! Luckily, a good fashion model always comes prepared." She pulled out a pale blue sweater dress in one claw and knee high boots in the other; damn, she was fast! Where did she get those from? Did she summon it? Like a god or something?

… okkkkaaaayyyy but even if she did, it was a nice outfit. Wendy definitely had style. I only had one teensy problem.

"Does the dress have to be so short? Princesses don't wear short clothes, you know."

"Peach wears bikinis. Rosalina wears waist length dresses. Zelda wears tube tops. And Zelda's a tomboy! You are too, right?"

"How'd you ever guess?"

"There's the attitude again. You've got to keep that under control, woman! Point is, princesses wear clothes way shorter than that. Besides, I worked my tush of on this dress!"

I smiled giddily. "Tush?"

"… yes."

"You just don't want to say the 'curse word', hmm?"

"PRINCESS DAISY! How could you ever—"

"Say it!"

"NO!"

"Oh come on, it's the mildest one ever! Here, I'll spell it out for you. A…"

"How dare you!"

"… S…"

"PRINCESS SARASALAND! I DEMAND SILENCE!"

I tried my best to look offended. "Oh no, I forgot the la-sss-t letter! How sss-illy of me! That was sss-tupid, wa-sss-n't it?"

Wendy glared at me harshly, but I caught a glimpse of a smile on her make-up made-up face. "Just try it on already! I want a girl buddy around here besides Peach who is totally hot like me! And you could be hot if you wanted to!"

"But I don't."

"Too bad. Try it on!"

"Okay, okay, I will." I put on my best stern face. "Now leave my presence at once!"

"You can't make me leave. This is my room!"

Oops. I was rocking it out there so much I forgot I was in Princess Wendy Fashionable Awesome Olivia Sexy Hot Beautiful Show-off Koopa in her room that she was willing to share with me. "Thanks for the room,"

Wendy looked at me suspiciously. "How'd it get from 'leave my presence at once' to 'thanks for the room'?"

"Uh, I don't know. I thought about it and recognized what you did was really thoughtful. So… thanks."

She looked pleased. "Finally, some manners. Don't mention it."

"I won't," I said with a grin. "_Now_ you can leave my presence at once."

Wendy huffed. "Fine. But only because I want you to have a bit of privacy while you get dressed. You better come down to the kitchen at 6:00 sharp, and you better look good!"

"Why 6?"

Wendy shrugged. "Come down at any time that's good for you. I _**so**_ want to see that new outfit on you, girl! 6 sounded the posh-est."

"Is that even a word?"

"It's French for fashionable."

"I will never get you."

"I know."

Samusaran101: Well there's the second chapter! Oh, and I also have a question: should I make the chapters long, short, or about the same as the last two? If you leave a review, please give your opinion! Thank you!


	3. Meeting the Koopalings

Sand and Lava

Samusaran101: OMG so many reviews! Well, okay, thirteen, but that's good for me! Here's the third chap! Oh, and a warning: this story has been all funny and happy and stuff, but remember, all stories need an argument. That'll probably appear in a few chapters. Beware! (Backs out of room dramatically) BUT! Before the fic, I'd like to thank…

Zaneyzane: For staying faithful to me and my incredibly long wait for the second chap! I appreciate your patience!

Dimentio magician charming56: OMG! I am SO INCREDIBLY SORRY for not putting him in this chap! I'm still waiting on your answers to the stupid questions I asked… I should've done it sooner! I PROMISE you your OC will be in the next chapter! I'm working on it now!

HugeBowserFan11: Thanks for the review! ^_^

Kookylover98: Thank you sooooo much for reviewing! And yes, I've brought Luddy in! Lol!

LumaniiDoesFanfictioon: Thank you for reading both chappies! I really appreciate it! Well… on with the show! Or story… whatever. R&R!

"Princess Daisy?"

"…"

"Princess Daisy?"

"… uh… go away…"

"Princess Daisy, get up!"

"… Leave me alone…"

"Don't make me come in there!"

"… Ugh… Wendy Koopa, is that you? If it is, I swear I will—"

"Hey! Do I sound like a girl to you?!"

As I grumbled and sat up in bed, I heard a chuckle. "Right on, bro,"

"Shut up, Ball boy. DAISY, COME OUT HERE THIS VERY INSTANT!"

"Okay, okay…" I hopped out of bed in my wrinkled blue PJs, ran a hand through my tangled mat of what must've been hair, and swung open the pink wood door, revealing… Lemmy and Larry Koopa? The twins were two of Bowser's eight sons.

I gave them a stern look. "What do you two want?"

Larry wasn't fazed in the slightest. "Well, we were just wondering if you could—"

Lemmy nudged his brother. "Song mode."

"Oh, okay." Larry started singing in a squeaky voice. "Puh-rincess Dai-ai-ai-zzzy, we-e-e were wondering if you-ou-OU would like-ike-ike to play BOWSER KART with us-us-us. Puh-LLLEEEAAASE! You belong with me-eee! You belong with—"

"Oh come on Larry. You saw Taylor Swift in concert last month."

"She's so good!"

I looked at them suspiciously. "What's Bowser Kart?'

"Well, it's basically M-A-R-I-O kart, but we're not allowed to say the name." Lemmy explained, peering at me through one lazy eye. "So we call it Bowser Kart. Want to join us? It's you, me, Larry, Ludwig, Morton, Wendy, Iggy, and King Dad."

"Did Bowser ask you to tell me?"

"Yep,"

"Well, if he wants me to come, then he should ask me," I pretended to look offended. "He shouldn't ask his kids. He should get off his lazy a—" I remembered I was dealing with thirteen-year-olds. "Um… butt… and come here.'

"Okay. We'll tell him to get off his lazy _'butt'_ and come over here." Lemmy used quotation marks with his fingers.

I glowered at him, blushing. "Just go get your dad!"

Moments later, Bowser came with a scowl on his face.

I slapped his bicep playfully. "Shame on you! Asking your own children to carry out your messages! _Tssk!_"

"Hey, that's what fathers do, right? Make their kids' lives miserable."

"You obviously need parenting lessons."

"No, I don't."

I frowned. "And why not, Mr. Wonderful?"

"I'm waaaayyyyy too sexy for lessons." Bowser posed.

I laughed. "So, can you ask me the proper way now?"

"Daisy, can you come with us to play Bowser Kart?"

"… eh."

"Princess Daisy, can you come with us to play Bowser Kart?"

"Nope, sorry. I can't hear you."

"Daisy, if you don't come with us to play Bowser Kart in the next thirty seconds, I am going to lock you up in a cage and—"

I cut him off with an eye roll. "Fine! I'll go."

"That's good." Bowser posed again.

I laughed. "Okay, you can go now. I'll be down there soon."

"Do you need help undressing?"

"What—NO!" I blushed crimson.

"Aww."

Bowser couldn't believe it.

His mind was throbbing.

His heart was pounding.

Princess Daisy, the hottest, prettiest, sexiest woman alive, had agreed to play Bowser Kart with him.

Of course, it was Mario Kart. He was just too stubborn to say his rival's name in his castle. But still, Daisy was playing with him! _**And**_ his kids. Wow, it had almost been a date if it weren't for those clever, bratty little turtles. _Selfish bastards…_

"Lemmy, vhat does Daisy vook like?" Bowser heard Ludwig's patient accented voice from across the hall.

"She's really hot," Larry remarked.

Bowser narrowed his eyes and stomped into Larry's bedroom where all the Koopalings were in: smart Ludwig, tall Iggy, pretty Wendy, blabbermouth Larry, troublemaker Lemmy, big tough-guy Morton, and cute Bowser Jr. He went right up to Larry and raised an eyebrow. "What was that, Larry?"

"Umm… nothing?" Larry tried to go for a winning smile.

"Good answer. She's too old for you, anyway."

"She's cool," Bowser Jr. said shyly.

"She sounds like quite an interesting young woman," Ludwig remarked.

"She curses," Lemmy beamed.

"I don't see what's so great about 'er," growled Morton. "It sounds like some crazy little tomboy chick with an attitude like Roy." The other Koopalings gasped at the forbidden name, than stared at Bowser in horror.

Bowser stepped toward his second (third, including you-know-who) oldest son in anger, and spoke in a low voice. "Princess Daisy is nothing like your so-called 'brother'. She actually enjoys us being around. I'd start being grateful if I were you."

Morton glowered. "You are _not_ me. And you obviously never will be. I'd rather die than be similar to a father like you."

More gasps escaped from the Koopalings. Ludwig frowned and glared at his younger brother. "How dare you! How could you speak like that about a person you never even met! I'm absolutely positive meeting Princess Daisy will be a pleasurable experience."

At that moment Princess Daisy stepped into the room, wearing a tight-fitting white and turquoise jumpsuit that made all the male princes swoon (except Morton). Wendy winked and gave a thumbs-up sign. She hesitantly stepped back. "I'm sorry. Am I interrupting?"

Morton frowned. "Yeah, you kind of—"

Ludwig cut his brother off. "Of course not, Miss Daisy. I am Prince Ludwig, Eldest Son of King Bowser. It is wonderful to meet you, Your Majesty," He bowed.

Junior ran up to the tomboy excitedly. "Hi, Daisy! I'm Bowser Jr., the awesome youngest son of Bowser!" He puffed up his chest a bit, which made the flower princess laugh. Morton rolled his eyes. _Show-off…_

Iggy was next. Although his tall form made him look big and strong, he still fiddled with his scepter nervously and stuttered, "H-hi Princess…"

"Hello! What's your name?"

"I-Iggy…"

Daisy laughed and turned to Bowser. "He's so cute! They all are!"

"Not as cute as you," Bowser stated with a grin. The woman blushed madly, and Morton snorted in obvious disdain. Yeah, she was cute, but way too cute to ever be good at sports or anything like that. _Women and their girly-girl habits…_

The princess turned to the Koopalings' dad. "Okay. I've met all of them… except that one." She pointed at Morton.

Morton grunted. "I don't need to be introduced by _you_, Princess Daisy. I already know all about you, thanks to Larry. Let's just say I'm Morton, the only son of Bowser who hates you. A _**lot**_,"

Miss 'Tomboy' glowered at him, fire dancing in her blue eyes. "I see. You don't take me seriously, do you?"

"Who could ever take a girly princess like you seriously?"

Wendy, for the first time in her sixteen years of age, cursed under her breath as she clamped her claws over Junior's ears. _Did Morton just call her a GP? He's a goner for sure._

"I'll let you know, _**Prince**_, that I won the championship for bowling, baseball, and soccer in one week, as well as beaten everyone except you and your family at M-A-R-I-O Kart," Her voice was dark with a trace of venom and smugness in it.

"So what? You can't beat me!"

"I'll bet I can."

"That's the problem with girls like you!" Morton snarled. "You're so full of yourself! Face it, Princess. You are a _woman_ in a world of _men_. And as much as your boyish attitude denies it, males will always overpower you. And there's nothing you can do about it, sweetheart,"

Daisy narrowed her eyes. "Oh really? And what if, perhaps, I beat your sorry ass into the ground today where you belong? Will I be strong than?"

"I would love to see you try, Princess,"

"You're on!"

Daisy and Morton were face-to-face, glaring.

Bowser awkwardly cleared his throat. "Um… everyone ready?"

"To prove a prissy princess wrong?" The Prince smirked. "Anytime."

Bowser glanced at him, his face calm but eyes burning with fury. "Morton, can I see you for a moment?"

"Sure thing," Morton stepped into the hall. "What do ya want?"

The Koopa King scowled at him harshly. "If you react to Princess Daisy like that ever again, Kammy will personally punish you for eternity. I swear. You have no idea how angry I am right now. You called her _girly_."

"So what?" he repeated scornfully.

"So she's going to kill you,"

I was going to kill that kid.

How dare he speak to me in such a way! He doesn't even know me! And he hated me already? And when I try and reason with him, he calls me a girly princess! That's like looking death in the eyes itself!

The nine of us walked into Bowser's personal race track. My jaw dropped at the sight. It had a huge, twisty course and bleachers everywhere with a workshop in the corner. Bowser led us there, grinning. "Now, all of you! Hurry up and pick a car! I can't wait to kick all of you're a—"

I kicked him in the shin. "Butts," I cut in for Junior's sake.

"Yeah. Mmm-hmmm. Sure. Yep. _Butts_,"

"Lemmy!"

"Sorry," The teenager grinned.

I almost immediately chose a blue motorcycle, which was the first vehicle I'd come across. Bowser had chosen his oh-so-precious creepy clown car and Bowser Jr. had a cute tiny car with a horn. Soon everyone had one. Annoyed, I noticed Morton had chosen a particularly large car. _I'm going to enjoy beating this jerk…_

I slung a leg over the vehicle, gripping the handles and adjusting the mirrors. As I glanced at my reflection briefly, I saw Morton's smug face behind me and I turned to him, frowning. "What do you want, squirt?"

"You have time to turn back, sweetheart. You won't have to defeat me, the best driver in all of the Darklands, and just say men are stronger than you will ever be. Or you can be humiliated in front of everyone. Your choice,"

"I'm sorry to rain on your parade, Mortie. But I won't be the one humiliated. And stop calling me that!"

Morton grinned, bowing mockingly. "As you wish, Princess. As you wish,"

I returned to adjusting my mirrors. Ludwig came up to me, giving me a thumbs-up sign. I thanked him, smiling. So far, Ludwig had been one of my favorite son of Bowser's. He was such a gentleman. But from what I heard, he was a good bicycler. _Hmm…_

Lakitu waved his flag. "Okay, everybody ready? Great! THREE! TWO! O—"

"Wait a minute! You're supposed to do that ready-set-GO thing!" Larry pointed out helpfully.

Ludwig stared at his dimwitted brother, obviously annoyed. "Vhat is the difference, Larry? Vhas it really matter?"

"I like that way better,"

Lakitu rolled his eyes as I stifled a giggle. Larry grinned, proud of annoying someone, probably.

"Of course, Prince Larry. Ready? Set?—"

"WAIT!" Wendy held up her hands traffic-cop style. "Is my lipstick smeared?" Everyone groaned, except Lakitu, who glowered.

"I think it is. I'll just reapply it," Wendy dabbed at her lips with the bright pink makeup and nodded. "Okay. I'm ready,"

"Good. Ready? Set? G—"

"STOP! WAIT! HOLD IT! HOLD EVERYTHING!" Lemmy bellowed.

Lakitu's face became entirely red as he zoomed right up to the Koopa teenager angrily. _"WHAT? WHAT COULD IT_ _**POSSIBLY**_ _BE THIS TIME?!"_

"Um… I forgot,"

Bowser smacked his forehead.

The cloud looked like he was about to explode, but he held up a hand calmly and flew back to his place. "You know what? Fine. I don't care anymore. I'm perfectly fine. Why? Because I'm thinking about after this race when I _never_ have to see you again, unless you decide to come back, which I hope you will not. Is there ANY more interruptions before we begin?"

"…"

"Great. Ready? Set? GO!"

Almost everyone raced ahead of me. Blinking, I put some extra speed into my motor and zipped past Bowser Jr., who was pulled up in a corner patting his car. I laughed when I saw that. _Oh kids… _

Next were Lemmy and Larry, who were bumping each other to the side. I zoomed past them also as they screamed, "HEY!" I grinned and waved back at the two rascals. "_Adios_, amigos!"

I easily passed Iggy and concentrated on the places. _Okay. Wendy's next. Than Ludwig and then Bowser. Last is Morton. _

When I pulled over next to her, she waved a manicured claw at me. "Hey! I so love your jumpsuit! It's totally sexy! Oh and here you go!" The girl shot a green shell in my direction, which I narrowly avoided. Smiling triumphantly, I bumped her pink car. "Ha ha! Missed m—AHH!" Another shell knocked me over.

"_**NEVER**_ underestimate beauty, Dai,"

I growled and earned a ? box. As a kid I'd thought they were stupid. But I praised the Lord when I found a red shell awaiting me. I tossed it in Wendy's direction. (I didn't have to though. It knows where it's going. Creepy.) "Oh yeah? Screw beauty! Tomboys _**RULE**_!" I thrust a fist into the air.

"You'll never beat Morton, girl. He's pretty darn fast,"

"Ha! I'll win over that know-it-all, don't worry." Truthfully I was scared as hell.

Ludwig came in sight. Once I moved next to him, he sighed. "Please vorgive me, Princess,"

"What the…" My wheels started spinning as they sharply stopped me for a good three seconds. The prince gave a nervous smile. "Um… vhey are vanana peels. Affective, no?" I sent another red shell in his direction. _One more left. For who? Bowser? Or Morton? _

I was now in third place. Bowser was right in front of me, grinning. "Hey! Want me? Come and get me!" I obliged, gripping the hand bars tightly.

The racetrack became bumpy as it went over skulls and pebbles. Bowser was still in the lead. And let me tell you; he knew it. Gritting my teeth, I tried pushing forward but was instead met with a bomb to the face.

_Damn! Damn! Damn!_

Now of course you know who I used the shell on.

I felt an odd sense of relief as Morton came into sight. He looked surprised, than impressed. "Wow. You made it. You're one strong person, Princess. But you'll never beat me." He raced up a hill, which I followed, avoiding falling rocks and spikes.

WHOMP! A green shell hit my car. I cursed as it flipped over and fumed at Morton's laughter. _Hell, I'm going to lose. Why do I want to beat this jerk anyway?_

_He called you girly._

I stopped and hurried to my feet, hopping on my motorcycle and starting to zoom through.

_He mocked you._

I narrowed my eyebrows and locked my gaze on the third oldest son of Bowser.

_He called you 'sweetheart'. Gross._

I was right behind Morton now.

_He thinks you're weak! Helpless! Defenseless! A real princess!_

"Hey, Morton!" I yelled.

_But you're not! Look at you! You're a champion! You've won awards and knocked everyone else out… and aren't you a woman?_

He looked over his shoulder, mouth agape. "You're still here?"

_ When he looks at you, he doesn't see a tomboy at all! He sees a __**girl**__. A __**woman**__!_

"Guess what?"

_He sees a prissy feminine brat!_

"What?"

_He sees… Peach!_

"I won,"

"You girly liar! No you— AHHH!" Morton slipped on a banana peel.

I smiled and crossed the finish line. Three words were jumping around in my head.

I beat Morton.

I beat Morton.

"I beat Morton," I whispered, disbelieving.

"DAIZZZY!" I turned to see Wendy running to me at full speed.

Oh _crap_.

"DAIZZZY! YOU DID IT! AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN MESS UP YOUR HAIR! OH I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT!"

"Um… yay! Now can you please get off of me?

"Oops… sorry,"

Morton walked up to me slowly. I raised an eyebrow, grinning. "Well?"

"You're a good driver," he replied blankly. "But my opinion of you still hasn't changed, nor will it ever. Even your greatest successes will never change the fact that you are a _woman_ in a _man's_ world. You have won this round, Princess. This battle is over. But the war has only begun." With that, he turned around and walked away.

_To my dear cousin Princess Peach,_

_Hey Peachy! You're probably worried sick over me. But I'm surprisingly fine. Bowser kidnapped me and all, but I'm starting to like it here. And no, this is NOT a fraud. I'm completely real! I'll ask him if I can go back, of course. I haven't forgotten about you dudes! I guess I should tell you about my experience so far. Well… I really like Ludwig! He's so smart, gentle, kind, polite, and almost everything else positive. He's very talented and his accent is so cute! Luddy is perfect and a great example for any other prince. Despite the fact he's the son of Bowser, he's calm, lovely, and very intelligent! Oh, great. Intelligent? Now I sound like you. No offense… it's just that you're always following the 'proper grammar' rules of life. Blah. _

_ I can't say the same about Larry and Lemmy, though. Don't get me wrong; I love those two, possibly even more than Ludwig! They're always burping and farting and 'accidentally' sitting on whoopee cushions that just happened to be under every single chair in the castle. They're hilarious! Those two troublemakers are way worth living for. For thirteen, Larry and Lemmy are tiny and adorable! Until you fall under one of their loose floorboards and get dumped into a giant lump of fresh manure. Which did NOT smell good. At all. When we were about to play a game of M-A-R-I-O Kart, Larry interrupted to say Lakitu was saying three-two-one when he was supposed to say ready-set-go! Can you believe that? Lemmy yelled like a mad person. 'HOLD IT! HOLD EVERYTHING!' I thought it was important… until he 'forgot' what he was going to say! And in the middle of all of that commotion, Wendy stopped everyone to put on lipstick._

_ Oh yeah, Wendy! Well… yeah, I guess I like her. But let me tell you this: she's a real girly girl. You would like her, actually. She's sort of difficult for me to get along with at times, but still caring nevertheless. That girl is all dresses, makeup, fashion… UGH! Just thinking about all that sh— I mean cr— oh God! STUFF! Yes, stuff — makes my head ache. _

_ Bowser Jr. is the cutest little Koopa in all of the Darklands! Wait, screw Darklands – the whole world! He'd be good with Toadette… hmm…_

_ Iggy's next. He's so tall I thought he'd be intimidating, but it turns out he's really shy. It's so cute! He's fourteen, I believe. I have to get to know him better! I can't wait! You should see him. Oh wait… you do. Every time you get kidnapped. Well… on to the big subject now: Morton._

_ Morton is a jerk. And I feel no pity saying it. He's so sexist! He calls me 'sweetheart' and 'Princess'. And when I beat him at M-A-R-I-O Kart, he says the war isn't over. What the hell? I really don't get him. My mother used to say 'once a bully, than a good person when you know them,' But Morton obviously doesn't want to know me better, nor do I about him. Talk soon, Peachy! Send me a letter once you get that chubby plumber to marry you! Kidding, kidding… Mario's awesome! But seriously, cut down on the spaghetti. P.S. If you tell him I said that, I hate you._

_ Love, your tomboyish cousin,_

_ Princess Daisy_

I smiled, satisfied, as I tucked the letter into a pocket pipe. It swallowed it whole, and I was glad to know it would be in my cousin's hands in less than five minutes. I thought about what Morton had said to me, his voice crisp, cool, and cold.

"_Even your greatest successes will not change the fact that you are a __**woman**__ in a __**man's**__ world. You have won this round, Princess. This battle is over. But the war has only begun,"_

"Okay, Morton," I whispered to myself. "If it's a war you want, it's a war you'll get."

Samusaran101: Ooh! Suspense! Dun dun dun! Review, peeps! Review! And _**PLEASE**_ give me ideas for the fight between Bowser and Daisy. There's more romance in the next chapter! I will give you credit! But I need ideas! I've got to explain what happened between Bowser and Roy some more… I'm even confusing myself!


	4. A Day At The Castle

Sand and Lava

Samusaran101: HOORAY! Now we've got twenty-one reviews!

Dimentio56: Well whoop-de-do.

Samusaran101: (glares)

Dimentio56: Sorry…

So… thanks, everyone! I'm bringing a new character into my story. He does not belong to me: he belongs to dimentio charming magician56. His name is Dimentio56. He's a calm, mild-mannered person who is nothing like Dimentio. He'll be in some chapters. If you want an OC in one of my stories, just PM me and I'll give you an answer! I can't guarantee it will be yes… but most likely it will be! Cause I'm a friendly person! ^_^ Unless someone steals my tacos. (Eyes glow red) MEEEEEEEEE TACOSSSSSSSS!

I'd like to thank:

HugeBowserFan11: Thanks for reviewing! It means a lot to me!

Kookylover98: Yep! Luddy is such a gentleman! ^_^ Thanks!

Dimentio charming magician56: Thanks! I FINALLY brought your OC into my story! Sorry for the long wait!

LumaniiDoesFanfiction: Lol! Yeah, Morton is stupid! Thanks for reviewing!

LovelyPrincess126: Thanks for the idea! ^_^

Spatterson: Thanks for the reviews! ^_^ Really? My friend told me the order was Ludwig, Roy, Morton, Lemmy and Larry, Iggy, and then Jun—wait a minute… (looks at Dimentio56)

Dimentio56: I did NOTHING! O_O

Yeah, you wish. Also, thanks to the fabulous AliceStar for the awesome ideas!

People have been PMing (Is that a word? O_O) me up a storm! Here are some of the questions I'd like to answer! And I LOVE questions! So feel free to talk or message me! Sometimes I feel so… alone… (sniffs)

_**Will Daisy ever get back to her friends and family?**_

Yes! Yes she will! Very soon too!

_**What happened with Roy and Bowser?**_

In time, people, in time!

_**Will Clawdia be in this?**_

Yep!

_**Can you bring Rosalina in?**_

Sure! She'll be here as soon as I find a spot for her!

_**Can there be more Bowser x Daisy cheesiness?**_

Well, you know, it _**IS**_ a Bowser x Daisy story! Of course! But true love cannot be rushed!

_**Are any OCs welcome?**_

Yes! Yes they are! In fact, I am in desperate NEED of them! So in your review, please give me one! Just not clowns. O_O I hate clowns.

_**Will you hurry the hell up and get on with the story already?!**_

What? No one asked tha—HEY! I'M TRYIN' TO MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY HERE! WAS IT YOU, DIMENTIO56?

Dimentio56: No again… you've got problems. (calls doctor)

Than it must've been YOU! (Points at Wario)

Wario: Sorry… sometimes I just eat too many garlic covered beans and I can't hold it in anymore…

Samusaran101: (Groans) Ah forget it. R&R!

Oh, and people, remember to read _The Tomboy and the Beast_!

Ludwig's long fingers slid gracefully over the keys of his piano. I watched from the doorway. I wanted to get to know the Koopalings better, and the conductor seemed like the perfect one to start. He was so quiet and polite. But somehow he always looked… troubled. Disturbed, rather. Like something was bothering him. Something like, oh I don't know… Roy perhaps?

…yes, I was being a stalker. But can you blame me?

Once the eldest son of Bowser stopped playing, I clapped loudly.

He jumped a little, whirling around nervously. "P-princess Sarasaland, I vresume?"

"Oh Luddy! Just call me Daisy! You know how I feel about those damned royal terms. Freaking regal right?" I rolled my eyes.

The smallest trace of a smile I'd ever seen in my life quirked at his mouth. "Ah,"

"What are you doing in here? It's a beautiful day! Don't you wanna play some sports?"

"No vhank you. I'm quite stuck in my studies therevore I shall vremain here. I've never been a sporty person like R—like some overs," he quickly corrected, averting his gaze.

"Do you want to tell me what happened with your father and Roy?" I asked quietly. It seemed like a huge thing, and I was determined to find out what it was.

Ludwig's face contorted into surprise to horror to disbelief. "You know…"

"Yes,"

"I…" He frowned and stared at his instrument. "I do not know vor sure. _Father _never told us, but I'm piecing together vhy he left…"

I noticed the hardness in his voice as he said 'Father' and walked over to him. Roy had left his family? But… Larry, Lemmy, Iggy, and Junior had never even met him in person! (I know Lemmy is the second oldest, but in this story he's thirteen like Larry.) Placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, I arched an eyebrow. "What are you piecing together?"

"Well… Clawdia, who was Father's vife, left the family… and Roy found out why. He vhas angered so he left… I think I know what happened…"

"Tell me,"

"I-it's not correct," Ludwig concluded.

"Can't you—"

"No," he said firmly, and I knew the conversation was over.

"Um…thanks!" I mumbled. "Got to go…"

"Vait," His voice was strained. "Claudia was a vather her crude and unvair woman. If she wasn't happy, no one vhas. She and Bowser were always… ah… _voing it_… at night." He turned red slightly but then continued. "Vut she is our..." –he looked like it was hard to get the word out— "our _Vother_. Ve are all siblings, vut… Roy…" The musician trailed off. "Just vecause our parents vere varried voesn't mean they had the same past relationship-vise. Some might've been closer than we believed,"

"Oh," Great. Now I had a puzzle to solve about what the hell he said.

Scratching my head, I turned back to the conductor. "If you need someone to talk to… you know, about the situation, you know who to come to. Okay?" I smiled kindly at him.

Ludwig gave a small nod. "I vill. Vhank you,"

"Breakfast is probably downstairs…"

"…"

Closing the door, I sighed. What did that mean about Roy not believing he had siblings? I had no idea. Eh whatever. I was starving!

I bumped into Wendy on the way down, who stared at me blankly. "You're kidding right?"

"Uh…"

"The outfit? Our little talk?" The princess looked terrified. "HUMANITY?!"

"Oh," I realized I was in a wrinkled T-shirt and shorts.

"Did you _sleep_ in your clothes?"

Oops. I actually had _slept_ in them.

"Maybe…"

"PRINCESS DAISY! I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU! GO UPSTAIRS AND CHANGE AT ONCE!"

"Who are you, my mother?" I huffed.

"GO!"

"Can't I just eat breakfast first?"

"Absolutely not!" Waving her scepter I was suddenly standing in a casual but nice flowing red shirt, black jeans, and knee-length brown boots. (Something told me Wendy loved those)

The princess winced, looking pained. "It seems a bit too normal…"

"Wendy I'm fine!" I assured her.

She looked pale. "Oh well… I guess so. If you excuse me I must go and apply my makeup. Thank you. See you around Daiz!"

Once I reached the kitchen, Lemmy turned around and grinned. He wore a purple hat that said 'Italy Makes Good Pizza' on it. "Well-a hello-a Princess Daisy-a! Would you like some-a breakfast-a?"

I rolled my eyes and scolded him, though giggling. "Lemmy! Don't make fun of the Mario brothers!"

"Make-a fun of the-a Mario brothers-a?" Larry emerged from the cabinet dramatically, face contorted in shock. He wore a pink apron that had 'I Heart Italy'. "How-a could we make-a fun of our own-a kind-a?"

Lemmy clutched at his chest like he was having a heart attack. "Oh! The pain-a! The pure Italian-a pain!"

"This is-a heartbreaking!"

"The spaghetti in my stomach has-a not digested-a!"

"Oh! This is-a worse than the time we were-a mistaken for Germans!"

"Let me-a dab at my eyes with some raw pasta!"

I was doubled over, gasping for breath between hoots of laughter. After I revived myself I grinned at them. "What's on the menu folks?"

Larry whipped out a pad, shrugging. "I don't know-a. Honestly, we've-a got everything-a. What do you usually have?"

"Um… a fruit tart,"

The brothers stared at me.

"… that's it?"

"Apparently princesses must stay at the perfect weight. 'Slim but not under mass', I think my teacher called it. Who says 'mass' anyway?" I made a face.

"This counts for special drastic measures," Lemmy countered, dropping the accent like this was the most serious thing in the world. "How about some warm apple-cinnamon English muffins with butter, Larry's chocolate chip banana pancakes, fried, scrambled, and hard-boiled eggs, cheesy pastries, fresh smoked pork bacon, toasted bread, French toast, and… uh…"

Larry took over, tapping his chin thoughtfully. "Let's add some pumpkin bread, almond butter spread crackers, sausage, ham, and my awesome vanilla milkshakes!"

"Whoa! That sounds great!" I was shocked; they could do this? I heard from Bowser Koopas could do everything, but of course, this was Mr. Egomaniac we were talking about. "But we can't eat all of it alone!"

"You're right," agreed Lemmy. "Let's invite King Dad over here!"

Larry immediately looked pained, grabbing his arm in agony. "OH! MY ARM! MY POOR SORE BROKEN ARM! Well I guess I can't go get Dad… one of you has to do it,"

I raised an eyebrow. "You know you use your legs to walk, right?"

"Oh yeah… OH! GOOD STARS IN STAR HEAVEN HELP ME! MY ACHING LEG! THE PAIN!"

Defeated and smiling, I put my arms up. "Alright I'll get him," I was actually wanting to spend time with the big 'hunk' (that's what he called himself) before asking him if I could go back. Bowser was definitely a person I wanted to know better. Maybe than he'd tell me about his son.

That wasn't the only reason I wanted to see him. I was kind of… well… _liking_ him. As a friend, I mean. He was funny, strong, and… well entertaining! The Koopa King was a lot more fun to be around than I'd ever imagined. It was hard to think the egomaniac was the one kidnapping my cousin for all these years.

I turned once more to visit Bowser's room. He was _rich_. He was _really_ rich. He was so rich it hurt to think about how rich he really was. Every place in his castle was carved in gold or just plain beautiful. A trillion dollars is worth nothing to him. _**NOTHING!**_

_Damn._

While once again admiring the castle's odd Bowser-ish beauty (statues of Bowser, heads of Bowser, photos of Bowser posing 'suavely', etc.), I bumped into a person I really hoped would one day be strangled by a vicious Koopa-eating beast: Morton Koopaling.

"You," I said in distaste.

"Hey, Princess," Morton smirked as my eye twitched. "Whatcha doin' round here?"

"I'm getting your dad. We're having breakfast,"

"Sweet. Mind if I join?"

_You bet your ass I do!_

"Why?" I snarled. "You never bothered to show up at anything else! Trying to get on my nerves again, as usual?"

Morton smirked. "Since, ya know, I'm his son and all, I'd thought I'd be nice havin' a family meal,"

"It's not really a family without Roy," I muttered.

Morton was calmer than Luddy by a lot, but still miffed. "Pops doesn't let us say that name in da house. Roy left us and stuff… so yeah. Now I'll be wait'n down 'ere since you don't want me round, Princess,"

"Why do you even use my royal name?" I pointed out. "It's obvious you don't respect it,"

"What should I call you? Daisy?"

"Only my friends use that,"

"Then I'll certainly never use dat one. Nah, I like princess. It reminds m e of who you really are: a woman," Winking, he left.

I fumed while stomping through the halls. _Ugh! That stupid, sexist, ugly, shove-it-up-his-ass Koopa! He's so freaking annoying! Why the hell does he even hate me? What did I ever do to him? I am going to kill him. I am going to personally grab his scepter and choke him with it in his sleep. Then I'll go to the damned store that sells them and burn it down! Then I will victory dance on his grave! Yes…_

Would I really do that? _Probably_ not. But if that kid called me 'just a woman' again, I'd honestly consider it.

Coming in front of Bowser's gold-encrusted 'domain of the handsomest king alive' (yeah, Bowser really needs to work on his names), I nervously rapped on his door. Bowser's loud voice echoed, making me jump in shock. "Kammy? Is that you? Great… alright hag, I need some KO Koopoo coffee in a mug—"

"Koopoo coffee?" I burst out into laughter. "Seriously? Oh my stars that's messed up!"

"What the—" The door swung open and Bowser peeked out. "Oh… Red?"

"Red?" I blinked. "Uh… yeah, I guess so…"

"Oh right! Daisy was sounding too boring for you, so I changed it to a _**ravishing**__—l" _He winked seductively as I turned pink,"_Red_!"

"Okay?"

"Wanna come in!"

Enter Bowser's room? Hey why not? I'd always wondered what room the Koopa King had.

"Of course!" I walked into his 'domain' and gaped like a fish.

It was bigger than all the rooms in my castle combined! A huge bed that took up most of the space was the most gigantic thing ever! Those pictures of the Darklands on the walls were amazing! And OMISTARS, his closet? It was ENORMOUS! Freaking huge!

"Holy crap," I uttered finally. "This is your room?"

Bowser winced. "It used to be bigger, but Morton wanted a gymnasium built in, so we cut off half of it… but hey it's still pretty badass huh?"

"_**PRETTY BADASS**_?! This is epic!" I touched his closet. "What's in here?"

"Shells,"

"You…" I frowned. "You change your shells?"

"Well duh!" Bowser huffed. "You didn't expect the King of Sexiness to wear the same shell all day did you?"

_Um, actually, Bow, that was precisely what I thought._

"I thought you were born with it!"

Bowser hesitated before laughing hysterically.

I glowered at him—was my thought really that laughable?

"I—I'm sorry," He wiped a tear from his eye, a stupid smile on his face.

Well he certainly didn't look it.

Grinning, he whipped open the closet. Sure enough, identical shells (about three of them—even though it was massive, the shells were pretty damn huge too) were stacked there. "A new shipment comes every two days. We kiss the old shell goodbye… uh not really… we burn it sometimes… ah ahem… and get new ones! All of us!"

_Except Roy. _

"Aren't they expensive?"

"Not at all! Junior's are about five thousand, Ludwig is around ten million, and mine are eight billion,"

"Each?"

"Yep,"

My mouth dropped open.

Bowser had an oh-I'm-so-rich smirk. "Pretty cool right?"

"Hell yes!"

"So… what brings you here? Got some news? Or just admiring my sexiness? I can pose if you want,"

I rolled my eyes. "We're having breakfast."

He groaned. "Oh stars, Larry and Lemmy are doing it, aren't they? _Sheyt…_ the last time Larry made those pancakes he 'mistook' a teaspoon of salt for the whole container. And let's not even get started on Lemmy's so-called milkshakes. He puts _soap_ in them! More like pukeshakes…"

Wrinkling my nose, I made a face. "Maybe this wasn't the best idea… they're probably too busy mimicking the Mario brothers to do anything right…"

Bowser's grossed-out face turned into a fierce scowl. "_Mario…_"

"Oops… sorry about that," I'd forgotten his rivalry and multiple fights with the plumber.

"It's fine. I would hate to try his spaghetti…"

"It's actually pretty good!"

"Eh,"

"Oh my Stars, that was delicious!" I moaned, crossing my arms over my stuffed stomach.

"Hell yeah," Bowser shoved a pancake into his mouth before raising an eyebrow at his grinning twins. "I hate to say this, but you prank-playing bastards really can cook,"

Larry nodded enthusiastically. "I especially love the toenails I added in the pancakes,"

Bowser spewed the food across the kitchen and gulped down some buttermilk as Lemmy seemed to catch on. "Ah indeed! And the ear wax added into the buttermilk brought out the dry tangy flavor!"

The 'mighty king' spat the liquid back into the cup and sprinted to the sink—wow he was believing all of this?! Omistars this was hilarious!"

Larry patted his sibling on the back. "Indeed dear brother! That was almost as genius as my idea of _showering_ in the sink—"

"Alright that's enough!" Bowser growled grabbing the twins. "Get the hell over to your rooms!"

Lemmy raised a claw hesitantly. "Should I add that I accidently spilled our soap into the shakes again?"

"_**GO!"**_

I laughed as the twins grumbled and walked along. "You really believed them?"

He shrugged. "With kids like those two you never know,"

"Showering in the sink though? Really?" I grinned.

"Yeah I think Larry should have done better with that one…"

I giggled and then spotted Junior smiling in the hall.

"Hey there BJ!" I greeted, offering a high-five. He wobbled over and smacked my hand playfully.

"What's going on Junior?" Bowser asked suspiciously. "I thought you were on a play date!"

I gasped. "You left him all by himself?!"

"He's a Koopa! He can handle it,"

"He's seven!"

"I'm eight!" Junior defended. "I had a play date all by myself without getting a booboo!"

I glanced at Bowser. "Mm hmm…

"And I met a really pretty girl!" He beamed. "Her name is—"

"Wait a minute!" Bowser interrupted. "Wasn't Morton there to pick you up?"

"No… I waited about an hour with my new best friend but he never came!" My temper flared as Bowser's eye twitched dangerously. "So I walked all the way back here!"

No one spoke for about three seconds. Then I uttered through gritted teeth. "That little…"

"When I get my hands on that brat," Bowser swore, "I am going to—"

"Can I introduce you to my new friend now?" Junior asked loudly. I laughed. He had the patience of his father.

"She's beautiful, nice, sweet, caring, beautiful, sweet, pretty, beautiful, caring, loving, sweet, and… uh…"

"Who is she?" I prompted excitedly.

"Be right back!" He darted away.

I giggled. "It looks like Junior has a girlfriend!"

Bowser's eyes bulged. He was what you might call 'an over protective father who will not let his kids date until they're thirty'. "Wait… _what!? _It's just a friend! A _friend_!"

"Things could be getting closer between them," I said seriously trying to keep a straight face.

"I have to go wash my face…" A child could've figured out that was a downright fib to stay out of the dating zone.

"You do that," I called after him, grinning.

"Okay! Here is my new bestest friend in the whole world… Toadette!"

_Toadette?!_ Toadette, as in the same Toadette who lives in the Mushroom Kingdom, is petrified of Bowser, and plays Twister with her brother Toad before snack time? Sure enough, the familiar mushroom girl was standing in front of me. She was smiling… until she caught sight of me. Gulping she bowed awkwardly.

I waved madly at the cutie. "Hey T-girl!"

"Hello Darklandian woman!" She bowed again.

I could only blink stupidly—huh? Since when was I '_**Darklandian woman**_'to Toadette?! What happened to Daisy? Or D-girl?! "Toadie it's me…"

"P-pardon me?"

Hold on just one freaking Star damn second! She didn't recognize me! Did I really look that different? Or even worse—did I look like a woman?!

"It's me, T! It's the same person who puts you and Toad to bed! The tomboyish princess of Sarasaland!" I waved my arms around.

A disbelieving glance morphed into a shocked smile. "Princess… Daisy?!"

"Yes!"

"Whoa! You look… awesome!"

"Um… thanks?" What I looked terrible before?

"If only Peach saw you now! D, it's been days!"

"Only three…"

"We forgot all about you!" she exploded gathering me into a massive hug.

"Oh," Of course. Who cares about me anyway? It's not like I have feelings or anything.

"But I knew you'd survive!"

"Survive?" I frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"With Bowser!" she cried. "Weren't you afraid?"

"No! Bowser's super nice! You just have to get to know him!"

The seven-year-old released me immediately. "So it's true…"

"What is?"

"You like him!"

"Yeah…"

"He didn't kill you yet?"

"He's not going to kill me!" I exploded. "Geez T! He's awesome! You don't know him well enough to judge him!"

"I know enough," She sighed. "Well it's late. BJ I'll talk to you later! And Daisy…" Toadette hesitated. "Come back soon. Your dad's in town,"

I stared as she swung open a door and left the room. Bowser came back with a wet towel. "What happened? Is something wrong?"

"No," I lied, forcing a tiny smile. "Everything's… perfect,"

"Um… okay?"

"So… what now?"

"Um… wanna sit on the deck?"

"You have a deck?"

"Yeah… seven of them… the one in the attic is the nicest. But we never really go up there because Iggy's scared of heights and hurls every time we go,"

I laughed while walking to the red-carpeted staircase with Bowser. "I was never scared of heights when I was a kid. I climbed trees and walls all the time. After I had to go through a stern act-like-a-lady speech by Mrs. Heathley but it was so worth it! It seemed fun to skydive but I never tried. My father would skin me alive!" I smiled like it was some kind of joke, but it was true. He'd be very angry with me.

Ever since Mother's death, Father had become utterly depressed. He used to play around with me, but… things changed. His grins faded and his friendliness dissolved into Mother's grave. The king was now the most serious man in Sarasaland… and perhaps even in the world. I didn't know how that had happened. Though he never spoke of it I could tell my dad—the once loving and caring one whom I'd called 'daddy' and laughed with—had never gotten over mom's death. He no longer liked me, and he no longer cared about my well-being. All that mattered was the royal family name I would inherit after he perished.

I pushed the painful thoughts aside and concentrated on the steps I walked up. Bowser was blabbering about skydiving. "… and then some jerk was, like, 'HOLY CRAP I'M SKYDIVING!' and I was like 'Yeah no kidding!' I would share more on my epic skydiving story but—WHAT THE HELL?!"

"Bowser!" I gasped as he spotted his youngest son, in the attic holding a picture of a beautiful Koopette and his father with a young Ludwig and a baby with a pink spiky shell—Roy.

He strode over and ripped it out of Junior's hands. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

He cowered. "I just… I wanted to…"

"Wanted to _what_?" Bowser snarled; I frowned at him.

"… Find out more about my family,"

"The only family you have," he was a little calmer now but still mad, "are your six brothers, sister, and I, your FATHER!"

"What about mommy?"

"What about her?" Bowser snapped. "Go to your room, Jr.,"

"But—"

"GO!"

"Yes… dad,"

Once he left I glanced at Bowser. "What was that all about?"

"Nothing," I could tell he was lying.

"You shouldn't have yelled at him like that,"

"He shouldn't have been up here!"

"He's just a kid!" I realized the fight was pointless. "Never mind, alright. Just go and apologize to him tomorrow!"

"No!"

I glared at him.

"Erm… still no…"

I glared at him harder.

"Okay fine…"

Smiling I looked around. The attic was a gorgeous finished place with a balcony that overlooked the Darklands. I walked to it and took a seat in one of the red-cushioned chairs. "This feels so great,"

Bowser plopped down next to me. "Yeah…"

Telling he wasn't relaxed I decided to start a conversation. "So… Wendy's the only girl in the family?"

"Besides Claw—I mean yep. She is,"

"Clawdia?" I pretended to look puzzled.

"My ex-wife,"

"Ah,"

"And what you said about Junior… he _doesn't_ have a girlfriend right?"

"Would it bother you if he did?" I asked innocently.

"What? No! But he doesn't right?"

Giggling I shook my head. "No. But he really likes Toadette,"

"TOADETTE?!" Bowser stood up abruptly. "THAT'S the woman he likes?! It could've at least been a Koop—"

I cut him off with a firm look. "They're friends. And friends must stick together,"

"Not together-together though. I'm thinking a six-foot limit,"

I laughed. "Oh… and Bowser?" Oh crappity crap here it was. The question of doom. TQD. Dun dun dun.

"Yeah?"

I managed to breathe out the eight syllables that had been stuck in my throat for the entire day. "What happened between you and Roy?"

A jester with torn clothes, barely breathing, leaned against a tree for support. The pain… oh good living Stars in Star Heaven the pain… it shot through his ankle and then went through his spine. What had happened again?

Oh right. Dimentio.

Dimentio wanted the child of the Cyberworld to help him with his evil schemes. When the brave sixteen-year-old refused, he'd sent wolves after him. How long had he been running? Hours? Days? Weeks, even? Miles were torn past in the determination of staying alive.

What was his name again? The jester frowned and took a cautious peer behind him.

Silence.

Good. Now, back to his name. The boy's brain strained to remember. Clenching his fists, he thought. But nothing came back to him. Though the cruel name Dimentio sounded familiar… something told him that wasn't it.

Pushing branches aside weakly, the desperate teenager caught sight of a huge castle. _Great. Maybe someone can help me there…_

He attempted to run there, only to end up sprawled on the ground cursing and swearing in agony.

"Uh… h-hello?"

A voice! Yes! Thank the stars! He looked up to find a male Koopa blinking at him. He had green hair and held a scepter.

"I-I'm Iggy," Iggy held a hand up. "I-I'll be right b-back. I-I'll get help,"

I'll get help. Those were the last words the jester heard before blacking out, his consciousness leaving him to lay on the ground alone.

Alone. Completely and utterly alone.

BOOM! What will be Bowser's reaction to the question? Who is this mysterious jester? Will Daisy strangle Morton one day? Why am I asking you all these questions?

Dimentio56: Because you're insane…

(eyes glow red)

Dimentio56: BECAUSE YOU ARE THE MOST WONDERFUL PERSON IN THE WORLD WITH TALENT AND BEAUTY AND AWESOMENESS! O_O

Ah… I feel better now. Wait—BEAUTY?! (goes to hair place, messes up hair, and comes back) Better… Let destiny—or reviews! XD—decide!

Dimentio56: … decide what?

Something!

Dimentio56: Um… okay. And one more thing.

Sure! What is it, D-man?

Dimentio56: Er… first of all, _never_ call me that.

(Sniffs) Okay…

Dimentio56: Second… you are a _**LIAR**_! You are nothing but a filthy scumbag annoying tomboyish crazily insane disturbed humanoid _**LIAR**_! I knew it! I was actually _**EXCITED**_ for this chapter when you _**HAD**_ to take the part I truly wanted out!

Uh… dude? No offense, but I have no idea what the hell you just said…

Dimentio56: O_O You took me out of your story!

What?

Dimentio56: Don't you 'What?' me, lady! You promised me I could be in this chapter!

Maybe you are!

Dimentio56: Wait… wha?

Alright people! Let's go home! We're done with this chapter!

Dimentio56: WAIT! What do you mean? WHAT DO YOU MEAN?!

(Tumbleweed floats by)

Dimentio56: I will NOT stand for this! (Faces reviewers) Hey! Do you guys know what that tomboy chick Samusaran1-0-whatever meant?

…

Dimentio56: HELLO?!

(Hehe…)


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